Badass of the Sea

En route Rarotonga, Cook Islands

Before we enter the Cook Islands you may be curious where they take their name from.

The fact that you don’t yet know means that we have been horribly remiss in failing to enlighten you about Captain James Cook, one of the most amazing explorers in the history of the planet Earth.  Ever.  No exceptions or qualifications or riders necessary.  Dude’s at the top of the heap.  Though Greg cannot find any hard confirmation, similarities to names of captains of starships with almost identical missions are more than likely not coincidental.  (Ok look, both went “boldly where no man went before” and ended up stumbling across insanely sexually open women, both were captains, both came from poor backgrounds, both were pretty handy in a fight, one ship was “Enterprise” the other “Endeavor” I mean come on!)

If you spend any time in any part of the South Pacific you will find bays, islands, mountains, heck entire countries named “Cook.”

The man has his own line of island beers named after him! (and they’re good beers too!)

Well why is that?

British Captain James Cook basically discovered the entire South Pacific.  Yep.  Whole thing.  Not exaggerating.  Everything from the Marquesas to…and including…Australia.  Thousands of islands, millions of square miles of open ocean, almost all of it gets attributed to him and his sailing ships.  Oh and he didn’t sail because, like us, it sounded like fun to get mugged by a freaking Kracken in the middle of the night.  He sailed because “back in the day,” that was the only option.  Pop his name into a Google search sometime and do a little reading on this guy.  He’s scary amazing and was wicked smart.  Sailed off into the blue back in the day when a lot of people would bet even money that that you would fall off the side of the planet and your odds of actually figuring out where you were with any accuracy was about a billion to one.  Have you ever tried celestial navigation?  We took a college course in it and we still wouldn’t put even money on it as a reliable means of navigation.

It’s a better way to go than calculating local apparent noon, trust us.

He came back from the unknown with accurate charts, detailed accounts of hundreds of plants that no one had ever heard of, places that defied the imagination and some of the most interesting cultures of humans on the planet hereto unknown to Europe.  Oh wait, he also discovered a continent for the Western world…which, being as there are only 7 on the planet and 3 were “discovered” by either being rigidly attached to or being Europe…look it’s impressive.  Here’s a rough approximation of what he explored for the British Crown

We’ve been sailing for months and we haven’t even managed to hardly scratch the surface of what this guy pulled off…and we had charts and a GPS!  Now granted, some of those charts have likely not been updated since he last dropped by but the point is, what we’re doing is considered ambitious and we actually know there is land out there.  He didn’t.  When his ship hit a reef because literally no one had ever charted those waters before, he didn’t just pull into the marina for a haul out and refit…oh no, this dude beaches his ship, tells his crew to put their big kid pants on and start chopping trees on an unknown island for replacement parts.  And let us tell you what, rebuilding a tall ship by hand in the middle of the greatest expanse of nothing on the planet with 10 trees on the island wasn’t any small feat.

After defying death on a mostly daily basis for years at a time on 3 voyages off into the great blue unknown, he finally died in Hawaii when he was attacked by locals while exploring.  After a vicious battle the islanders killed him and ate his remains in order to grow stronger, a local custom.  They sent some of his remains back to his First Officer who returned them to Britain for burial.

So the reason everything from the bay we’re in, to the island it’s attached to, to the country that owns it, to the beer in our hands is named Cook?  Because if you discovered 1/3 of the entire planet you’d probably call dibs on a few islands too.

…and we’d agree you’d earned it.

Like this article? Check out our exploration of the capital of the Marquesas in the entry Next Stop: Taiohae Bay, Nuku Hiva, French Polynesia for more history on the Europeans in French Polynesia.

Leaving French Polynesia

Departing Bora Bora, Society Islands, French Polynesia

Leaving Bora Bora spelled the end of our journeys in French Polynesia.

The feeling was…mixed.  We had seen so much and at the same time had only scratched the surface of this complex colony were West meets South and Islanders mingle with Frenchmen.  We saw about 14 different islands in “the blue continent.”  We didn’t visit about 103 islands and 2 of the five island chains didn’t even get a passing glace from us.  Because of our limited time here we didn’t even spend much more than a week in a given place.

It would be like saying you understand America after spending a week in New York, Huston and San Francisco.  Granted, you’d know a great deal and there’d be a whole lot you missed too.

The decision to leave is pretty easy.  The French government will make us vacate the country in about a week and being deported is rarely good for one’s continued welcome at other South Pacific countries.  Also, French Polynesia is only the second country we’ve managed to visit in our grand tour of the Pacific; the first being Mexico.  Though, arguably, you could say each island chain is a unique culture and you’d be right and while we’ve managed to travel thousands of miles by sea, we’re still on country #2.

We have traveled though French Polynesia under a simple philosophy “we may not pass this way again.”  Because, odds are, we will not.  Not that we couldn’t, just that now that we have been here there are a lot of other places both of us want to see before we come around for a second pass to our favorite parts of the world.  There is a lot of planet out there and the more we see, the bigger it gets.  The world is really a small place, right up until the point it becomes huge. Continue reading “Leaving French Polynesia”

Some work, mostly play in Paradise

Bora Bora, Society Islands, French Polynesia

So now that we got that pesky “work” out of the way, we can relax right?

Most of our time was spent at the Bora – Bora yacht club.  “Why” you ask?  It’s the BORA BORA YACHT CLUB!  Two words dude: Bragging.  Rights.  If that isn’t reason enough, we don’t know what is:

Oh, and they have a thatched roof hut as their main building, which is awesome.

Greg did a bit more work on the computer while Tiffany went on a hike of Bora Bora with some of the other ships’ crews.  It was hot.  It rained.  Everyone was very happy to have an opportunity to use their cheap Mexican ponchos and good times were had by all:

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But the two big highlights of Bora Bora playtime were:

1)  The diving.  Our current captain, Brian, is an avid diver.  As in there is a dive compressor onboard along with 4 full dive kits.  This means we go diving.  A lot.  Also, he has a dive camera with a depth rating of about 100 feet so we got some awesome footage of the sea life of Bora Bora: Continue reading “Some work, mostly play in Paradise”

Bora Bora Business Day

Bora Bora, Society Islands, French Polynesia

While underway enroute to Bora Bora for our second visit we realized we had some business phone calls to make.  They weren’t anything huge; just checking in with our virtual assistant, following up with Greg’s old business partner, that kind of stuff.  But we figured since we already went and got the picture and all, we might as well actually have a business day in Bora Bora.

At its core, the work day is much the same as an inport workday is anywhere else:  Greg and Tiffany sit at their respective computers and type, take photos of documents, make phone calls on Skype, etc.  for a few hours at a time.

But there is something about our surroundings that just makes it somehow a little bit better.  Imagine this as the view from your office: Continue reading “Bora Bora Business Day”

What do you mean we’re only half way!?

 En-route Bora Bora, Society Islands, French Polynesia

Before we return to Bora Bora to experience Battle Fortress: South Pacific as a cruiser instead of a “normal tourist” let us take a moment to draw attention to a particular little point of interest that we figured out on our first trip here:

But hey, maybe those numbers aren’t hitting you with quite the magnitude that they hit us. It’s in kilometers even, so how far is that? Aren’t kilometers shorter than miles anyway? (PS- yes, they are. 1 kilometer = .62 miles, but still, that’s a long way!) So let’s avoid the numbers for a second and cut to the skinny: after all this time, we’re only half way there, give or take. Even then we’re assuming “there” is Sydney vice Moscow, Europe, India or any other arbitrary point of land.  So Tiffany attempted a more graphic presentation to provide some perspective on our total distance traveled vs distance left to go in this ocean.

The word “size” takes on completely new dimensions when you are dealing with the Pacific Ocean. We have previously described to you the continent-sized island nations that are in abundance throughout the Pacific, but we haven’t actually described the size of the ocean itself. When we were working in Coast Guard Pacific Command both of us had the phrase “millions of square miles of open ocean” listed under our responsibilities but that number is just to big to get a grip on. Seriously, can you picture in your mind a million square miles of water?

The Pacific Ocean is the largest single body on our planet. You mean body of water, right? No, no we don’t. We mean the largest body of ANYTHING on our planet. North America pales in comparison, the Atlantic Ocean really shouldn’t share the same last name and Asia isn’t much more than, if you’ll excuse the somewhat appropriate pun, a drop in the bucket compared to the vastness of the Pacific. In fact, speaking of continents, we have been told that if you took every single scrap of dry land on Earth and put it into the Pacific, you’d still have room for a second Africa!

One of the things we learned on this journey is that some things cannot be accurately described…or even filmed. How do we describe to you a barren desert larger than anything else on this Earth filled with salt water? How do we show you what it feels like to know you are on a 50 foot ship and that for days, if not weeks, the closest point of land in any direction is two miles straight down? Everest could get dumped into this ocean and no one would ever find it!

This ocean borders our home country. In the past it has protected us and even today she feeds us. We have sailed her for quite a while now, but nowhere near as long as many others have. The Pacific is huge, diverse and amazing…and we’ve only come less than half way across her.

The Tahiti-Moorea Rendezvous

Moorea, Society Islands, French Polynesia

Well, now that we got the whole troublesome sailing bit out of the way, let’s get to the partying…

…by getting in an even smaller boat, but this time with no means of automated propulsion and in the rain!

(We don’t get it either dude…)

The first thing we did was participate in the national sport of French Polynesia by competing in 4-man Polynesian canoe races.  As we had actually sailed to Tahiti with our friends Allan and Alison, they cross-recruited us into their canoe and coconut shucking team.

Difficult to paddle and almost impossible to steer; how the heck did these people colonize the South Pacific in these things!?  Continue reading “The Tahiti-Moorea Rendezvous”

The Dark Side of Cruising

Tahiti, Society Islands, French Polynesia

After some really great adventures, some terrifying moments and only one major “first aid incident it was time to say goodbye to mom and once again become a group of two.

One last piece of Polynesian tourism to explore before she departs though.

Continue reading “The Dark Side of Cruising”

Bora Bora Bungalow Life

Bora Bora, Society Islands, French Polynesia

You know those “beach success pictures” that you see on marketing materials?  Come on, you know what we’re talking about: the person in their swimsuit,

(obviously a very young attractive person because we all know only really hot people go to the beach…)

sitting on the beach with their laptop,

(like it’s normal to use your computer at the beach…)

Looking very excited because, as the picture implies, they have spent their day playing on the sand

(we’re sure it’s not in the water because their hair is always perfect)

and, “oh I’ll just hop on the internet real quick and check my investments…”

(Come on, how many beaches have internet access?  And wouldn’t you be worried about sand getting in the laptop? Or oh I dunno, water?  And by the way, how are you even able to see your screen in the blazing bright sunlight?  Really, who brings their computer to the beach!?)

“…and oh my goodness I’m a millionaire and I didn’t do anything!  You should be like me!”

Yes, that picture.  Being as Greg has a history working in the training industry and has strived to actually help people, he has always had a certain amused infatuation for this type of picture.  He loves the simple ridiculousness of it.  There we were in Bora Bora and we just had to get our “beachside laptop millionaire” photo:

As you can see in the background of the picture, we stayed at yet another overwater bungalow during our time as “normal tourists.”  We did want to have an authentic tourist experience, after all.  There were a few interesting differences from our other bungalow experience: Continue reading “Bora Bora Bungalow Life”

Bora Bora by Bicycle

Bora Bora, Society Islands, French Polynesia

First off, seriously, why is this not a post card?

And the best part is you know the only reason someone went through all the trouble to create that sign was because someone else gave them excellent reason to…and no, before you ask, it wasn’t Greg.

Bora Bora is supposed to be one of the most beautiful places in the world and conveniently, thanks again to the American war effort, there is this really nice road around the entire main island that you can ride a bike on. About 4 hours round trip. It isn’t exactly a large island, being as it’s sinking and all.

We were off to see if the island could deliver on all the hype… Continue reading “Bora Bora by Bicycle”

Bora Bora here we come!

Onward to Bora Bora, the island you’ve all heard of and dreamed about – we’re actually going there!!!  For our first visit with Tiffany’s Mom, we’re going by plane.  And as we already knew, Tahitians don’t have the same dress code as the rest of the world!  Here’s business casual as defined by the airport attendants:

Yeah, not your typical power suit!

Oh, the Air Tahiti Nui planes have a great symbol on them.  It’s the Tahitian tiaré flower, one of their native flowers that has seven petals.  It smells wonderfully like a gardenia, and can be found growing all over Tahiti.  Tahitians are really into their flowers and “flower language”– The tradition shows that if a flower is worn on behind the left ear means Continue reading “Bora Bora here we come!”