Another aspect of friendship is the joint lexicon a group develops over time. Shared experiences become stories, stories become jokes, jokes become catchphrases and so on until it gets to the point where simply mentioning the last name of a high school teacher will bring smirks, smiles or groans of anguish from the right circle of people while making absolutely no sense to anyone else.
The longer one stays with a given group, the more detailed this secret language becomes. By extrapolation, one can easily concede that in 11+ years of exclusive relationship (8+ of actual marriage) quite an expansive vocabulary would develop. We bring this up, dear friends, to issue you fair warning:
If either of us ever describe an activity you are about to join us on as “Kiwi moderate” run away quickly.
We have no other way to describe it. “gods” seems too presumptuous for monotheists and “demi-gods” too second-rate. “Champions” too sporty and “giants” too dependent on physical proportions.
These are not people who we hope to someday become, or observe in awe from a distance and pray might deem us good enough to network with. These are the people with whom we drink beer and play Dungeons and Dragons. (Well, some of them. The rest are more into video games. We mix it up.)
Of course, they aren’t all those things to us. Usually they have first names and are, in general, rather humble about it all. Nonetheless when we stop to think about it the people around us are quite the collection. If we are indeed the product of those that surround us then we are grateful for the excellence of those we call friends. (That would be you all, in case you were checking.)
So as you might guess when we get an invite from one of these exceptional people for an amazing adventure, we do our best to make good…
Tiffany: Last year Greg had a birthday post all to himself so he’s decided to keep the tradition alive this year. Please indulge him…
Greg: We have started being asked fairly frequently when we’re coming back, so I guess using that as a gauge, we’ve been gone long enough to be missed 😉
Again a year has passed and we’re still out here in the South Pacific. New island though so that counts as progress right?
Yes it’s a palm tree, but it’s a different palm tree!
This year was an experiment: Would it actually be possible to maintain a twice weekly text & video travel blog while sailing around the world? Well as we’re about to hit our first full year doing integrated entries yes, reckon it is. We are way more surprised than any of you that we’re about to post our 100th page of the new format. Lost count of the videos. According to WordPress it’s something around 400+. It’s been a BIG lift.
And now that we’ve done that, there is so much more to do! Again, you will see massive upgrades in the coming year. As we have learned in business and now blogging, start with the basics and build up as you go. Here’s a preview… Continue reading “So, when are you coming home?”
Did you know that when Sharks get into large groups (say like 50 plus) they school, like fish?
So we learned something new today.
More of that in a minute, let’s get down to brass taxes: Brad Kellogg owes us $67.25.
For those of you who are not friends with us on Facebook, you should be. Mainly because that’s where most of the commentary for the blog happens each week. Why is this? Probably because thanks to the miracle of the friend finder, all our old smart aleck friends from our previous lives have connected with us and form some form of hybrid “metamind / advice giving / peanut gallery” thing.
So enters Brad, good friend from high school and expert at egging Greg on. Actually, good at egging anyone on. The guy’s got a gift. If he ends up a senator, I called it.
After my last post about the sharks, Brad comments to Greg: “5 bucks float with the sharks for 5 minutes, and I’ll toss in an extra quarter for each shark ya can count, double dog dare ya!”
Ok, I’m a worshipper of A Christmas story. I’ll even spot you the Triple Dog Dare.
(If you don’t understand the Christmas story reference, you OBVIOUSLY don’t watch TBS on Christmas…and your life is poorer for it 😉
Now, you may be saying to yourself, “Wait Greg, there was a MAX of 7 sharks in that video, assuming every new cut was with new sharks.” So that’s $6.50.
Yes, that. Here’s the rest of the 250 sharks we went swimming with (dive masters best estimate, not mine.) Oh, and the highly lethal stonefish which doesn’t count for an extra quarter but could kill you just as dead.
Now we were in the water for about 45 minutes but since there was no repeating stipulation on the bet, I won’t advocate for the $605.25 I could potentially claim. 😉
The South Pass was not all just highly lethal sea creatures. I mean really, 250 sharks aren’t just going to hang around unless there’s food nearby and wow, was there. A smorgasbord of every color and type of tropical reef fish, coral, you name it. Amazing does not describe what we saw: this video hardly gives you a taste of the varied and beautiful sea life that surrounded us every time we got in the water.
(PS – thanks to Serge & the guys from Fatu Hiva for the awesome music!)
After what could easily be qualified as a “bumpy” night transit south, against the wind and the waves we find ourselves on the island of Fatu Hiva in French Polynesia. (For our non-sailing friends, it’s called “bashing” when you drive into the wind & waves. It sucks. A lot. This single fact alone actually explains why the entire international cruising community constantly sails to the west; in order to avoid bashing as much as humanly possible.)
We anchored in the Bay of Penises. Now wait one second. Before you get all uppity on me, look, don’t blame me that the Polynesian people came up with overly descriptive names for things, because that’s the freaking original Polynesian name, alright (well, the English translation at least). It’s due to the rock towers that surround the bay. I’m serious, look it up. (Tiff’s note – the name of the town is Hana Vave in Fatu Hiva) For those of you too lazy to look it up, I explain the whole issue (inserting my own obvious bias and providing nice views of the anchorage, but not of the male reproductive system) here:
Having arrived at what arguably could be the most amazingly named place on the entire planet, we spent our two days here:
Firstly, by exploring the village. Being as the total island inhabitants number at about 650 split between two villages, this took about a grand total of 15 minutes. We did however discover some precious little tidbits. Such as, everyone eats coconuts here and I mean everyone.
Also, speaking of chickens and coconuts, you may want to think twice before you buy that “all natural” tropical coconut meat or coconut oil in the grocery store.
Polynesians do have cats and dogs…lots of cats and dogs, but they also keep other interesting animals on leashes.
We also ran into an interesting event going on as we arrived: all the school aged children were leaving. Because of the minimal population, there are only grade schools on the island. Anyone wanting a high school education has to travel by ferry 10 hours or so to Hiva Oa. The nearest college is in Tahiti (again, about 2000 miles away.) So kids who want an education spend a lot of time away from home from the 8th grade on.
Ladies and gentlemen, today I am here to talk to you about the perils of boobies. (no, we are not about to talk about pre-marital sex here. It’s the name of a bird dude. As in blue-footed boobies (or orange-footed, whatever)).
Don’t let the cuteness fool you. These little warm weather aviary ambassadors of the devil himself have been with us since our departure. My friends, as the crewmember with the most seaborne combat experience (hey, I am a trained boarding officer) I have led our valiant efforts to repel these determined air pirates for several days now. Though our first attempts were admittedly crude and pathetically unsuccessful.
We only suffered a minimum of self-inflicted casualties …
… and have recently upgraded our techniques. The scales of victory slowly tipped in our direction and our safe voyage appeared assured…until the enemy, under the cover of darkness, marshaled their forces and without warning staged their own personal Tet Offensive…
The enemy struck without warning, on all fronts and we were initially clearly overwhelmed. Pressing the advantage one of our foes grew so brave as to land in our cockpit and make a dive for the hatch below decks! Allan had to literally tackle this squawking, flapping Captain Jack Sparrow-wanna-be with a rug while Alison pelted them both with a fruit basket (more friendly fire) and cast the beast from our vessel into the murky darkness. (sorry, no video on that one, happened a little too fast.)
The battle rages on…
– Greg
(On another booby note, we ran into someone with a t-shirt that said “I love boobies” and a cartoon of 2 little blue booby feet on it 🙂 – Tiff)
Ah the happy crew of the good ship FLY AWEIGH, decked out in their 2010 puddle jump regalia. We figured we should get the pictures handled before the scurvy set in.
For those of you who don’t know, the term “puddle jump” is the name people use to describe the trip we are undertaking by sailing from Mexico to Tahiti in French Polynesia.
Our first 30 minutes underway we received an interesting omen of things to come.
At least we got our man overboard drill out of the way first thing…is it a bad sign if the mop sank to the bottom before we recovered it?
Having made our sacrifice to King Neptune’s housekeeping staff, we rapidly shifted gears into that most critical of all getting underway rituals: Calling everyone you know for the obligatory rushed goodbye call
It’s great to finally be underway and heading somewhere new. Now, don’t get me wrong, Mexico has been a blast and La Cruz has earned a special place in my heart. I mean between bar cats taking my sodas, swarms of butterflies covering mountaintops, all the great people we met, and lets not forget Mexican car horns or my breakout role in the made for Sci-fi movie SHARKTOPUS (this October kids, mark your calendars!) Mexico has most assuredly been a good time. (PS, for if you missed any of the above, check the previous posts.) However, I would hate to come back to the states and have the following conversation:
Friend: “Where you been?”
Me: “Oh, I’ve been traveling around the world.”
Friend: “Wow cool! Where did you go?”
Me: “Mexico.”
A drastically unfair prejudice formerly held by myself is that Mexico is “right next door.” SOME of Mexico (read Tijuana and some desert) is in fact next door and a lot of Mexico is freaking far, far away. Tiff and I sailed for weeks straight and I would say we got about half way down one coast. A lot of cruisers sail Mexican waters for years and never get bored or move on…and I can see why.
I feel that Tiff and I are becoming well known here in La Cruz de Huanacaxtle. We have friends, the owner of the local British pub doesn’t even need to ask me what I’ll be having when I come in, a Guinness and fish & chips just show up (which is awesome, by the way). I think Tiff and I stopped being tourists here a few weeks ago and actually started living here. This is great feeling and we either need to buy a house or move on. Since there is a lot more world out there and the idea was to go around it, its time to move on. I am nervous though that Allan’s prediction may be closer to the mark than any of us are willing to admit.
Besides the idea of crossing the largest expanse of nothing on the planet in what my friend Michael describes as, “a glorified bathtub with a big bedsheet on front” intrigues me. Though I would also like to point out this “glorified bathtub” comes decked out with basically every electromechanical toy you could possible want, not to mention private guest quarters with attached bathrooms and showers! If you don’t know boats too well, allow me to assure you, this is the lap of luxury when it comes to crewing.
Whelp, here we go…
(Imagine that video was your last sight of solid ground for a month straight…)
If you had told me a year ago that I would spend my next birthday sitting in a 40 kilometer wide lagoon in Rangiroa, French Polynesia on a sailing yacht I might have agreed it was possible, but I certainly wouldn’t have put any money on the odds. This year has been one heck of a ride: I started out 12 months ago starting to see the results of years of hard work and sacrifice pay off…just to be reminded what it feels like to be betrayed by someone you trust implicitly a few months later. However, this time, I also had the rare privilege of experiencing what it feels like to have a friend stick by you when all hell breaks loose and things fall apart. I have opened offices, employed people, and had someone tell me I am the reason their children are fed and their marriage still exists. A pastor told me that killing someone might be seen as justifiable in God’s eyes but that local law enforcement might not be so open to the idea. I needed to hear it more than I realized at the time. I have learned some Spanish, can hold a simple conversation in French and have been told by a Polynesian that I make “good music” with one of his instruments. I still don’t know how to read music. I have read more of the Bible than ever before and have earned my SCUBA certification in one of the most idyllic diving paradises in the known world. I have been reminded how well Tiffany and I can work together in our element and we won a sailing race! We now know what 1 million monarch butterflies look like when viewed from a hill top at once and that not all Mexican busses have livestock aboard, in fact few do. Tiffany and I have sailed across the equator and crossed an ocean in a 44 ft sailboat. We’ve made some great new friends along the way while missing those we left behind a lot more than we realized. Right now Tiffany is cooking me a key lime pie with the last of the lime juice we brought from Mexico.
Like I said, it’s been a heck of a ride. I certainly would not say I wouldn’t change a thing, because I would. I can say I played the hand that was dealt me as well as I could and I’ll keep doing just that.…which brings me around to this blog. I have put a lot of thought and effort into revising this journal and I have come to the conclusion that the progress desperately needs to keep up while at the same time allowing you to see the sights I see and hear what I hear. I don’t want you to just read about what I’m doing, I want you to experience as much of this trip as possible and I want to give you more than just the words I find on a lot of other blogs. I have some massive updates for this little video journal that are ripe for the happening. One little challenge: I am in the butt-arse end middle of nowhere right now and it takes about 3 hours to send a simple email! However, wheels are turning, assistants are being contacted and alternate forms of delivery are being arranged. Expect to see changes in the middle of June. We’ll see how well it goes and this is the basic plan:
1) Entries will be parsed down to the best 10 or so videos for each place I’m at.
2) All entries will be accompanied by text and posted together so you get a more complete story all at once instead of piecemeal.
You’ll be able to browse entries at your leisure and keep up with our travels better than you have been while putting in less effort. I need your help with this though: I need your comments so I know what it is you are looking for. What do you want to see of French Polynesia, the South Pacific, Australia, Asia, Russia, etc? People, cultural events, scenic vistas or more of me getting myself into amusing situations? Hey if nothing else, drop me a note for a happy birthday. My ability to respond is limited (being as I am on an island several thousand miles away from the nearest continent or even 1st world country) and I do read what you all say.
Thanks for sharing the adventure.
-Greg
PS – what do you think of me working at a remote outpost in the middle of the Australian outback for a few months? Just curious.
If either of us ever describe an activity you are about to join us on as “Kiwi moderate” run away quickly.
